'Noises in the Dark. Voices from the Asylum'

The negative aspects are just too many to list, at least comprehensively so.
The reasons for dabbling in such a financially draining enterprise, yet to be fully justified to myself.
If entering the murky waters of Scottish Football has ever profited an individual in entirety, then I’d like to know who.
Fergus you say?!…Sure the smart little number crunching Scotsman, walked from the club fully reimbursed (and some) in a financial sense, but at what price to his health, his reputation, his privacy and his sanity?
Few who have ever dabbled in the game of football investment have ever struck ‘gold’…few realistically expect to.
The games investors are usually billionaires with ‘wealth off the radar’ or indeed are rich men who for all their often substantial financial input, do so for altogether different reasons.
These reasons may range from massaging their inflated egos to increasing their public profile but in general terms these ‘investors’, certainly those of any great scale, are committed, committed usually through passionate and deeply held affection for the club of their investment.
Rarely if ever do even the richest men in the sport, buy up a club and not meet with fans resistance, not arouse the supporters suspicions…rarely are ‘investors’ readily accepted.
The thought of strangers running, what amounts to us as an institution , an institution to many thousands, perhaps tens or hundreds of thousands, even millions of devoted fans, is bad enough but the cheek of expecting financial compensation and gain…that strikes the average football fan as a man to be as trusted as a Magpie in a jewellery store!
Imagine then if you will, what a horrid, wretched, unforgiving and thankless task Mr Green may be having to win over the fans of a ‘former’ club, a club stripped of not just it’s dignity, it’s pride or it’s silverware, but it’s very existence.
No, Mr Green after successive owners many failures and inadequacies, even bare faced lies…faces an altogether tougher assignment.
In these circumstances he must use all the charm known to man, he must strike tem as a passionate supporter, a true voice of the people, one of them.
Only he doesn’t…he prefers blind comedy instead!
I’m growing to appreciate Mr Charles ‘Moonbeam’ Green, he seems quite a decent fit for the club that once was Rangers.
Even if he did turn the fans opinions around, won over their hearts and minds (and all without enlisting the help of Derren Brown), even then he’s on a hiding to nothing.
Why?! Because he’s doomed, the club he proposes is doomed…doomed financially, morally and in sake of unity also.
The ‘Bears’ ain’t happy…they realise they may be facing a arsh winter of discontent, that they have measly spring and summer harvests to tide them through the long dark days ahead.
Perhaps even surviving till winter winds lash across the Govan landscape, could be seen as somewhat of a moral victory. It sure is a challenge to see out it’s infacnt days, weeks, months and years.
Spare my Green your thoughts, your goodwill and your condolences…in equal measure he needs them more than he needs ‘wealth off the radar’ itself.
Why?! Because the mans an incompetent fool if he thinks that his anti-charm is turning anyone on,. If he thinks for even just a second that the SPL fans will rest up in their vociferous call to arms, or that the fans of Extinct FC are happy to buy into an experimental concept of austerity so severe that David Cameron would baulk at it’s scale….then he is officially mad, stark raving mad.
But then that’s a quality any of his converts are also clearly fitting of too.
I can say no more than to let his own words do the talking.
Do enjoy the comedy (with my analysis below each gag!!)
Speaking exclusively to RangersTV, Green said: “Look we’ve always said that we bought the club because we want to play a team in Europe, we want to rebuild the image of this club, and everybody wants to play in the Premier League.
“the club”…a club! “Play a team in Europe”…arrange a pre-season friendly with Motherwell then! “rebuild the image”…build a club first Charles your getting ahead of yourself.”
Oh and wait for it, “everybody wants to play in the Premier League.”…oh well then competition is sure to be fierce for that vacant 12th spot then!
“Whether that can happen is out of my control, it’s in the hands of the other members of that league.”
Ah ain’t it nice to hear he’s confident bout having an assured grip on the situation at least!
“But my emails are blocked at the moment with fans thanking me for saving their club but making it very clear that Rangers fans will unite whether we play in the SPL the First Division or the Third Division.”
Oh dear, he doesn’t get it does he…’Rangers’ their dead…who does he think he is Hayley Joel Osment?
“I know that Rangers fans will not desert this club. But it’s important, not just for Rangers but for the whole of Scottish football, because the financial implications for the whole of Scotland, not just for SPL clubs, is a massive, massive problem to face up to.”
Yay…my favourite bit, the ‘siege mentality’….only they already did desert ‘THAT’ club…why would he expect loyalty to Sevco 5088?
“And there is no easy solution, it’s something we all have to deal with, we all have to take responsibility for and we all have to come up with something that works not just for an individual club but for the whole collective.”
Now I like this, I sense contrition ahead…’we must take responsibility for’…oops, theres that damn ‘but’…he’s passing the responsibility around like a whore at a gang-bang! I not likey.
“I think some of the views we see and some of the comments are not based on business and of course the criticism I regularly get burdened with is, for me, every decision is about business.
“It’s not about passion, it’s not about commitment to a cause, it’s purely about doing what is right financially because if there is no money – and that doesn’t just include Rangers Football Club, it includes the SFA, SPL and the old mantra of going right down to grass roots football – we go out of business.”
Ah!! There you have it, the crux of his plan…the cash, the readys…the WONGA!!!
Now I’m going to abstain from further comment, except to say this…way to win the fans over Charles…it is ‘The Rangers’, the very one, fans had known and loved all along…still lacking the ‘passion’ and the ‘commitment’ I see?!
Now do I not like that?
Thanks Charles, can’t wait for your next press conference eminating from the safety of your padded cell…quality mate, pure comedy gold!!
SSSHHHH!! If your quite and you listen carefully, you can hear his evil cackle over the walls of the asylum.
Ghostly and haunting ain’t it? 😉

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