Is it me or them? by @Dermo67 On Depression


I find myself constantly asking myself, is it my fault? Have I taken my tablets today? I don’t understand these mood swings, nipping at people for the slightest things, putting on an act to entertain people, I remember once being told to come to a party because I would keep people laughing ,later I asked myself was I only invited because of my sense of humour and it was a family member who’d asked me to come along, still makes me angry thinking about it, anyway no point in dwelling on that.

You are probably asking where is this rant going? Well the answer is depression. The scourge of people, depression get a bad name because we use the word “mental” as part of it’s description, people are scared of that word ,even I was until I was diagnosed with depression.

I am glad I went to the doctors, fortunate for me I had an understanding doctor, before I go any further I recommend anyone who thinks they are suffering …go now and find out, the longer you wait the worse it becomes, I left it for about 6/7 months before I saw someone.

I should have known there was something wrong..people asking me what’s wrong? Why are you so grumpy? The real victims in this were my family not me, I couldn’t see I was wrong, but the day my wife threw me out the car..I knew I wasn’t right, that’s when I went to see doctor and from thereafter various or medical people, all I hasten to add were great. I still have mood swings but that is to be expected…a tablet doesn’t take depression away it only helps you along.

The purpose of this story is, if you are feeling that something is wrong, go and see a doctor, don’t listen to the “get over it” or “you’ll be fine tomorrow “brigade they don’t know how you really feel.

Even to this day some of my family still don’t understand what depression is..I have tried to explain but it’s hard.

Please I urge you if you feel that something is wrong go and see someone…and that’s not the local barman..I can assure you that doesn’t work, don’t be put off by the expression Mental’s just a title, if you were feeling unwell you’d go to the doctor, it’s just the same.

If you feel you are suffering from lack of sleep, mood swings these are just a couple of things to look out for..I’ll leave you with the thought of, you’re not only helping yourself but you are helping those around you.

Dermot @Dermo67

Dermot will shortly be doing a program with Billy No’well on depression.

Here are some helpful links;

4 thoughts on “Is it me or them? by @Dermo67 On Depression

  1. I am replying with my own blog here where I talk about depression and other invisible disabilities. I hope I can help you at least a little Dermo. I talk as me, not connected to TCN on this subject.

    The biggest thing about depression is knowing the trigger, the why’s and how’s, education is TOTALLY EVERYTHING; mostly everyone who is depressed has a trigger. The trigger can be hard to find, but in many it is a past event. Depression happens when chemicals are released by the Brain; the following 4 are the worst, Serotonin, Norepinephrine, norepinephrine and dopamine. The Cerebral cortex (Both sides of the brain at the front, the brain is split in the middle, 2 parts) the Thalamus and Hippocampus (Middle) are the problem areas for releasing the chemicals or “FEAR” That is a term used by many as a way to describe the feeling, it is vital to know about the Chemicals and what they do and cause. Your/our/anyone’s brain thinks something bad is happening and releases these chemicals and depression/fear happens. It tricks us, so we must learn to trick it back. Also often depression is genetic and passed down from family. But we can still trick our minds.

    So like anyone don’t settle for Dr’s Medication only mate, ask your Dr to speak to a depression expert and he will send you to one. I was DEEPLY depressed for a few years, once I learnt my trigger I can now control it and trick my mind back. I have not been depressed for a long time now, when I feel it coming on I know how to trick it, it is mind games, being ill is not nice, it is a game of cat and mouse with yourself. If you really want help, email me Dermo and I can send you something that would usually cost £40, I can send it in email and explain how it helps you fight depression.

    In a study I was part of in Edinburgh [Ashley Ainsley and a few more places) it was found in over 85% of people who suffered depression that they experienced a childhood event or a serious traumatic event in life, this is the trigger depressed people need to find. Try and write down when the depression comes and goes, what you are doing when the depression comes on, it could be watching TV, driving in your car, whatever it is, write it down and keep a record of it, this will help the experts help you find your trigger for depression. My trigger was people fighting, just sent the dark clouds and made me angry and depressed. I didn’t know it was due to what I experienced as a kid, the violence and more, I was keeping track of when my depression happened, I was watching a movie one night nice and I relaxed and on came heavy depression, it was a fight scene in the movie, so my Trigger was People fighting, arguing, I didn’t realise it could be this as this was a time I was doing Adults football and got threatened with a beheading most weekends, and at the time there was no reaction, but it came later. I know my trigger, and it helped, you need to find yours.

    The biggest cause of depression as we turn into adults and makes the depression worse is stress, this is on top of a condition anyone might already have releasing these chemicals. Stress can kill, so can depression, this is why I say WELL DONE to you and anyone who comes out and talks about it. My respect for Neil Lennon went up (If possible) when he came out and admitted his depression. Talking is a huge help, what you have done here is talk and be honest.

    Lennon talking about his depression in video below:

    You said

    “The purpose of this story is, if you are feeling that something is wrong, go and see a doctor, don’t listen to the “get over it” or “you’ll be fine tomorrow” brigade, they don’t know how you really feel.”

    And you couldn’t be more correct Dermo. I will say this only because it is relative, when I was on twitter all the time the “Brigade” of any type didn’t help me, I was an VERY ill man in an bad place, many knew and were there for me and I talk to them still, but there is a stigma in every depression story and mine was no different. Had it not been for the dozens of good Celtic fans I may have spiralled to Suicide. This is where it takes many sadly. Thousands take their life due to depression and the sad thing is all they needed to do was talk.
    I hope with you talking you encourage others to come forward. Nobody will mock, nobody will have fun in your name, nobody will poke fun at you, anyone who does that to someone who admits they have a disability doesn’t understand the damage they are doing, to themselves also. You do learn to laugh at the “Get over it” or “you’ll be fine tomorrow” brigade, we all do. I am thankful I went to hell and back, even when I was on twitter before, it released me from HELL. All good now. So now I help others who are in a bad place or are depressed. I myself would rather listen to a fellow sufferer than I would some kid out of college with a book, no disrespect to anyone there. Just my thoughts.

    The offer stands on help, just let me know, nobody need know. I know with some people they will admit issues but not like to take it further. There is treatment and help for you and I can help a little, but see a Dr first, just be careful what medication your Dr puts you on, sometimes the medication can lead to bigger problems.
    Cheers, Shaun
    Wullie, any chance you can stick these images somewhere, I think it is something any site needs and it helps with the whole issue when it comes to disabled people “Not all disabilities are in black and white” The picture explains it. And it may encourage people to also speak out as I did and as Dermo is here. We suffer different things but we both suffer an invisible disability. I would appreciate it if you could find a space for these images or at least one. They do help, and that is what we as a club do, there are links in there could be invaluable to anyone.

    Image one with a link

    Image 2 with a link:


  2. @dermo67

    I am more than familiar with this illness both as a carer, supporter and a sufferer. The one sure fact is that it is the most misunderstood illness of all time. Pills and “get a grip of yourself” is not quite the professional approach one expects but it is so often the one experienced. After a lot of years, I believe patience and understanding is probably as much as anyone can offer in support. It is an illness from within and only the individual can find a remedy that suits.

    H H

    1. Very well said Arthur as I said, knowing what causes your dark cloud can change your life for the better. I mean anyone suffering. My reply below explains how I went through Hell and back, as many have and like you became a carer. I think the best people to advise anyone on any illness, is an ex sufferer.


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